What you should (not) adapt to real life...

[Wolkendrache]

1) What you should do as often as you can...
- When you leave your appartement, put a huge long case clock in front of your door
- If someone is unfriendly to you, offer him/her a sandwich
- If the police or public authorities ask for your name, answer Schtolteheim Reinbach, Piisuke or Masamune
- Leave your house with a bandana and a broomstick
- If someone asks for your help, put a bowl and 3 dice on the table…
- If someone asks for your help, throw a coin into a stream…
- Try to push forward huge gates
- Ask your grandpa to accompany you to a waterfall nearby

2) What you should do, but not too often...
- Start a petition to make your town be renamed to Bier Blanche
- Tickle your friends from behind or pull their ears for no reason
- Buy a wooden amulet as a birthday present for your father
- Introduce a male friend as „This is bear“

3) What you should not do at all...
- Hire a private detective to spy on 1. your sister, 2. a dog, 3. him-/herself
- Develop a tea paranoia and decline every cup of tea (especially in England and Japan)
- If you realize you supported the wrong side, pretend severe pain in your arm
- Rob a store and later assert it was a look-alike
- Let a tournament decide who’s gonna marry your daughter
- Introduce a female friend as „This is bear“

Some more ideas?

[wataru14]

Refer to a female friend as "giant woman."

[sticky-runes]

If you want to rebel against your father, refusing to marry the chick he tried to force your marriage to is one thing. Fornicating around inns and taverns is another. But raising an army and beating your dad to death with a stick is a little extreme.

[BrucePrintscreen]

When you're caught in the middle of doing something stupid, say "Uh-oh..." and claim you just teleported there inadvertendly.

When asked for help, refuse unless the person did more than 50,000$ of benefits (I think many banks are following this advice, in fact)

If you have bug bites, go sit and have a drink in a bar and ask random people for an antidote.

Bear a black wig, a black dress, loop earrings, throw a card deck in the air, and ask me for an adult conversation.

If someone offers you some wine, kill him before he betrays you.

Anytime you need to walk accross a bridge, get all your female friends and relatives to do it with you.

Next time you go to the swimming pool, bring six hex statues.

Anytime you go to a chinese restaurant, enter the kitchen, and challenge the cook for your recipe.

And last but not least: when you play a Neil Young record, tell your friends "this is bear".

[Wolkendrache]

Refer to a female friend as "giant woman."

How could I forget that. But be warned that balls of hate will come flying at you, not as literal as in the game, but still...

When asked for help, refuse unless the person did more than 50,000$ of benefits (I think many banks are following this advice, in fact)

True, and if a bankster accepts your offer, play the recruitment sound and/or do the respective hero movement from S2.

When asked for help, answer you don't want to have anything to do with weaklings.
When asked for help, examine the person from all four sides.
When asked for help, tell that person you hate humans.
If someone refuses to help you, show him the sharpest weapon you have.

[sticky-runes]

If you want to get past security, try one of the following:

• - Get a slutty friend to make the guard an offer he can't refuse
  - Think up a ridiculous sounding name that doesn't suit your appearance in the slightest
  - Use an ID borrowed from someone much older or younger than you and put on an unconvincing performance

Think about the guards - standing in a doorway all day can be incredibly tedious, so if you want to risk arrest, then at least give them an amusing story they can tell their mates at the pub later on.

[BrucePrintscreen]

When asked for help, refuse unless the person did more than 50,000$ of benefits (I think many banks are following this advice, in fact)

True, and if a bankster accepts your offer, play the recruitment sound and/or do the respective hero movement from S2.

"My yes, of course sir, we will grant you a mortgage even if you cannot afford that house!"

[Wolkendrache]

"My yes, of course sir, we will grant you a mortgage even if you cannot afford that house!"

"Great, 'coz I need the credit to become the most successful businessman, meow! I don't wanna end up lying beside an inn, starving, and waiting for a merciful passerby to pay for my food."

If you want to get past security, try one of the following:

• - Get a slutty friend to make the guard an offer he can't refuse
  - Think up a ridiculous sounding name that doesn't suit your appearance in the slightest
  - Use an ID borrowed from someone much older or younger than you and put on an unconvincing performance

Think about the guards - standing in a doorway all day can be incredibly tedious, so if you want to risk arrest, then at least give them an amusing story they can tell their mates at the pub later on.

Or just do the Viktor-style...