Actually this began in the „Suckoden“ thread, but let’s continue it here. What I’m asking you to do is, tell your favorite joke(s) in suikoden-ized form, so just replace the persons with suitable Suikoden characters for some easy fun!
Let me begin with a story about the missing sheep …
One day, Hoi was walking through Kobold forest in search of treasures, but he only found opened and empty treasure chests, so he decided to go back to Kobold village to take a break. On his way back, not far from the village, he stumbled on an unopened chest. The fact that this chest was incredibly huge left Hoi even more astonished. He quickly picked the lock and lifted the lid. There was a necklace hanging at the bottom side of the lid, so he bent over the edge of the chest and took the necklace. Suddenly he got a fright when he realized that the chest had no bottom; there was only a dark hole. After recovering from his shock, he thought to himself: “Maybe there is gold down there, but I can’t just jump in as long as I don’t know how deep that hole is.” He took a stone as big as his fist and threw it into the chest, but there was no sound coming back out of it. “Maybe this stone was too small” he said. He found a big stone which he could just manage to lift and pushed it into the chest. Still no sound. “I need a frickin’ rock! And someone able to carry it…”
He went to the inn of Kobold village and found Gantetsu there. “Hey, baldy monk, would you help a good friend? You could become a rich baldy monk” Hoi whispered in his ear. “Gantetsu doesn’t need to be rich, I’m a strong monk!” he replied. Hoi pondered for a while, and then he said “The thing is, there is a rock that nobody could ever move, and I was wondering if the strongest person I know can move it.” Gantetsu instantly felt challenged and shouted “Take me to it!”
The two entered the forest and halfway between the entry and the chest Hoi coincidently spotted a rock as tall as Gantetsu. “There it is!” he cried, “you have to take it and throw it into a hole nearby, and your fame will skyrocket!” Gantetsu lifted the rock and followed Hoi to the chest. The rock was much too heavy for poor Gantetsu, but due to his willpower he managed to push the rock into the chest before he collapsed out of exhaustion. Hoi didn’t care about the monk; he immediately hung his head into the chest and hoped to finally hear a sound. However, the only thing he could hear was the bleating of a sheep which turned louder and louder. “There’s a sheep coming out!” he thought. Suddenly a sheep came jumping into the chest from behind Hoi’s back. Hoi got a fright, because he was expecting the sheep coming from the other direction. He was confused.
Shortly thereafter Yuzu showed up and shouted at Hoi, “You thief! You stole my sheep! Confess!!!” Hoi, desperately trying to defend himself, said “No… listen… there was a sheep jumping into that chest over there on its own, I swear!” Yuzu cried “Liar! I tied it to a rock, so you must have stolen it!”
I hope you liked that one
And I hope to I can read your suikoden-ized jokes soon (as for me, I will add more once in a while). It doesn’t matter how long or short these are, it doesn’t even matter how funny, they only have to be Suikoden!